just this....

all you want from life
is for someone to hold your hand
and tells you he understands

someone who carries you through the night
and tells you it´s allright

no-one to be found
in a land half drowned
by the reign of sorrow

solitude strikes again
and kicks you into the dark
of its hope sucking mouth

emptied and spit back
into the plain cold
you lament to the moon alone
and carve your tears
into a voiceless sky

giving in

eyes turn white
times pass away

faith shakes the hand
fright stirs the flesh

this skin grows too tight
and winds up in a garden of thorns

all roses in colours of blood
faith loses its grip

lost
in a dark paradise
with a ragged shell
and dripping blossoms
that can´t carry the weight
of a life unwanted

lost

cold fingers
splintered nails
clinging on to a cup
and a moment
slipping from life´s realm
like the coffee´s steam

aching back
and a crack in the wall
decay swallows all
faster still if you look back

filling a page
feeling sick
a blissless starvation wage
no flowers to pick

intestines burn
and the night is of ice
dead hours and no way to kill them
glee went abroad
home is covered in plight

splintered dreams
cold light
wrecked heart
so it seems

a fleeting beating in the dark
an echo closing in from the walls
a cracked melody entering my sleep

i can´t hear you
are you home?
i cut in too deep
i wind like a worm
i lost you
long before you were gone

glamour & gutter

he spat in the mud
bleeding teeth
broken glass
too much of too little and all that

tear drained eyes
staring down the gutter
sounds of frozen kindness
in shiny red shoes
tapping and rapping
on the plaster

he shuddered
took heart
and shook off disaster
nose-up he joined in line
and paralleled steps
with the lady from glamourama
perfect skin
sweating out champagne
splendid looks
and a mind so sane

"The rage, the madness, and the pain
how sad to numb a broken nose in the snow
if you could just sit in the glow
with wrapped-up glamour to go"
he thought
and shuddered

too little in too much and all that
and back he was
scarring his life in the gutter
and crying his soul awake again

thin air on plane/plain

caged in a box of plastic, metal, leather, air-conditioning and tired, bored faces sitting and waiting in line
for a coffee and a life
served in disposable cups
"Caution- Content´s hot!"
We swallow and chew on lukewarm pleasures
and numb the aftertaste
with a teeth-bleaching peppermint
before being greeted conventionally
by a kiss and a hug
at another end of this world
as though the in-between
had been bridged by no more than
a sigh and a sip

"nowhere´s here with you on my skin"

let me fall into your arms
let´s roll across broken flowers
into lovers´end lane
let´s rent a room in the sky and one underground
and tumble, crawl, fuck up and down the stairs together
let´s hang from the ceiling, bang against walls,
fall to pieces on the carpet
bite, steal, and scare others
like rats in holes and channels
play a little song
write a broken poem
peace on earth between the sheets
while feather-like dust tickles our fused skin
with the first stirrings of day
in weak pale morning light
where did the (f)night carry us?
nowhere´s here with you on my skin

*catwalk*

..the word scribbled on a toilet door in a cinema in Zürich. It catches the impression I got on Bahnhofsstraße- snobbish middle aged and exchangeable faces and styles of men and women wearing a masquerade of expensive clothes, make-up, nose-up shopping busyness. it´s like they own the pavement because the red carpets of chanel, rolex and cartier are rolled out for them. a uniformed army of stainfree diamonds knitting a chain round the royal neck of their closed society. diversity and motion is only to be found in places promising escape and opening a window to the world outside the shiny glow of shopping windows, cashmere, fur, silk and bleak phoney conversations- main station, seaside, basel....

maybe i am the narrow thinker and stereotyping observer here...but first impressions always count and they kept me thinking about deeper matters: how can satisfaction and a feeling of warm, calm comfort enter our hearts if we hang all of our grand ideals and dreams onto one place? do ideals narrow our view and judgment more than that they provide wings to meet greater, more significant, unchained ends?

what are ideals about?

jung said that all addictions are alike and lists idealism among them....

i will have to follow this train of thought...but not now. there are still some switzerland experiences to gather...